


In Defense of Petunia Dursley

by Fle



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Character Study, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:01:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27039142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fle/pseuds/Fle
Summary: Imagine that when you were a 10 (or whatever) year old kid wearing your sparkly pink tutu and wanting to grow up to be a fairy princess, you found out that magic was actually real, and there was a whole world out there ripe to explore! With maybe real fairies! But not for you, HAHAHA, no it was only for your *wonderful* *perfect* spoiled bratty little sister, who ruined your favourite teddy bear and stole your Halloween candy from your locked box, but you couldn’t prove it until now that magic was real. And this explained every single time that little Lily got whatever she wanted with absolutely no consequences all her life, as if the frickn’ universe itself conformed to her happiness.
Relationships: Hahahaha NONE
Kudos: 3





	In Defense of Petunia Dursley

**Author's Note:**

> This is a work of fiction, and does not condone book actions.
> 
> But most of you will agree, families of muggleborns get a raw deal in the Harry Potter books.

Now, clearly mistakes were made in life. Many mistakes. Obviously. But; there are a few things to consider:

\- Imagine that when you were a 10 (or whatever) year old kid wearing your sparkly pink tutu and wanting to grow up to be a fairy princess, you found out that magic was actually real, and there was a whole world out there ripe to explore! With maybe real fairies! But not for you, HAHAHA, no it was only for your _*wonderful* *perfect*_ spoiled bratty little sister, who ruined your favourite teddy bear and stole your Halloween candy from your locked box, but you couldn’t prove it until now that _magic was real_. And this explained every single time that little Lily got whatever she wanted with absolutely no consequences all her life, as if the frickn’ universe itself conformed to her happiness, while you were left washing mud out of the carpet and picking up the broken glass on your own.

\- Then you were told that to be able to fulfill her epic magic destiny, she would get to go to some bullshit magic castle for most of the year, and live like a fairy princess and get her own magic wand that could make rainbow sparkles. And no, there is no mistake, there is a 0% chance of you being magic too. No point trying hard or anything, you don’t have magic so sucks to be you. Also, the money that was supposed to go towards you going on foreign exchange to France is instead going to bullshit magic school fees, so just be happy for your sister why don’t you.

\- Still, you bottle it up and try to write her letters but all she talks about is how amazing the castle is, and how she’s great at charms and her friends give her awesome magic presents and scarves with colours that move, and how she’s not liking her MAGIC POTIONS class at her MAGIC SCHOOL. You, meanwhile, are failing math class because your old friends left when you insisted magic was real, and the jerk Terry Higgins sitting behind you keeps pulling your braids and yelling for you to cast a spell if you want him to stop.

\- Then you learn that your little sister doesn’t want to see you over the holidays, because your drab, depressing existence just can’t compete with magic food. Also she doesn’t want to associate with your family anymore, because apparently people at magic school are racist (species-ist?), she wants to spend most of the summer at her friend’s magic mansion, oh and by the way his family has more money than the frickn’ queen. Also the week she does visit, she spends half of it complaining about how utterly boring and “moogle” everything is, and the other half flirting with the boy down the street who also gets to go to the bullshit magic school, because clearly the universe loves everyone except you. And no, she won’t use magic to cure your acne or straighten your teeth or help you get into dance competitions, magic is only for important stuff, like making her favourite scarf change colours to match every outfit of hers.

\- Clearly using the skills from her magic education, you are later informed that she already married her rich racist boyfriend right out of Magic High School (?????), and you are not invited to the wedding, and don’t you dare ever contact her, because she doesn’t want to be associated with you “moogles” anymore, and also you suck. When your dad falls ill, she doesn’t visit. Not even for the funeral. You try to get into a good college, but your heart’s not into it. You don’t understand why you weren’t worthy enough to be magic too, and it keeps you up at night.

\- Now, life goes on, and Vernon wasn’t your first choice, but he was a stable choice and you just couldn’t stand waking up alone everyday and looking into the cold mirror reflection. Can everyone around you also see that you aren’t worthy? Is that why the neighbors are staring at you?

\- Maybe you figure, that’s just life. You put in the hours and then you’ll die and who knows? If magic is real maybe you’ll get a next life where you get a magic destiny. Or maybe you see a legion of therapists, and they give you happy pills and convince you made up everything as a kid and need to face reality as an adult.

\- One day, a baby is left on your door with a letter saying that your sister died because a racist terrorist killed her and her racist boyfriend, and now you need to raise their spawn or something something blood nards. You imagine if the situation was reversed, and know Lily would never care for your child. Just like she never cared for you. When you drop off little Harry (your sister’s perfect judging eyes) at the orphanage, the hospital, and child protective services, somehow he always finds his way back on your porch. Miss Robernin across the street sees him on the porch one time, and now all the neighbors ask how could you be so irresponsible to let a baby lie on the porch? What if something happened? An old bearded man in a fuchsia dress and bunny slippers drops by and threatens you, and at this point you’re just done. You’re going to move to America, where the FBI stops this shit from happening, and everything is normal. You crave normal.

\- You are informed that you are not allowed to move to America because this baby has a _*magical destiny*_ and will save the entire universe and for that he needs to be in this neighborhood, and never leave the country, or else. You ask about your actual child, who might have a destiny to become a lifesaving doctor in America, and you are told that moogles will never achieve anything important anyway. You tune out the threats, since you don’t understand most of the words. You get the tickets anyway, and you board the plane, but for some reason you always end up back in your house in Privet drive with holes in your memory. The same thing happens with the boat tickets and train tickets. You think you might be single handed-ly funding your therapist’s retirement fund. Your brain is getting really fuzzy lately, and complex thought is hard. All you really know for sure is that Dudley isn’t worth any less because he doesn’t get a destiny, no matter who says otherwise. You feel bitter.

\- Raising a child is hard. Like, really hard. Especially a child you don’t want and weren’t expecting IN ADDITION TO another child that you probably don’t want and didn’t consider the consequences of having. You pictured your life would be a grand series of elegant tea parties and society events, not diaper season shit-show: now with extra diapers and super heavy on the shit.

\- All in all, it’s a miracle you retained a semblance of sanity for this long.


End file.
